inspiration

I have again settled into a mood this week. The mood where i hate everything about my life. All the positive and encouraging words people say to me get filtered through and i look for confrontation with the people who mean the most to me. I hate weeks like these i feel uninspired, non-creative and emotional. I dont like myself, my surroundings or my life. When i get like this, i am getting much better at stepping away from the situations that provoke and stimulate this mindset and I have to change it quickly. Put on an a favorite song, bake some favorite banana bread (which i did today) or escape for a while into a book. when i start to evenn think about these things i feel better. Just being proud of myself for how far i have come and how i am able to control these mood swings and depressed days like i have never been able to do before.. It was dark and gray and yucky this morning a reflection of my emotions of the last few days, but as afternoon settled in the sun came out and as i noticed the change in the weather i KNEW i had to change myself. I got back into the housework routine, surfed the net for inspirational pictures and tortured the dog for a while. lol. I didnt get anything, seems the dog is mirroring my rotten mood.. too.

Time to swallow all of lifes frustrations, again look at what i can learn from them and go to... uh ughmm, work with a (half) smile. lol